April 29th, 2011
I woke up this morning at 4:30 to watch the Royal Wedding. Kyle thought I was kind of silly to do so. But I still hear people talk about Charles and Diana's wedding and I've never heard a single person say they wished they hadn't watched it. I'm not sorry I got up. It was so unbelievable beautiful and touching. I only got to the TV in time to see Kate (I'm not doing the duchess Catherine thing here) get out of the car in front of Westminster, with the bells ringing just for her. From the moment they said the sun came out for her the tears were just flowing. She was so beautiful. The dress is exactly perfect for her. And the veil and tiara. Mmmm, so so so pretty. William was dashing in his uniform, too. A real Prince Charming. The abbey was so incredibly beautifully decorated, too. The trees lining the aisle just about took my breath away. My favorite part was when William first stood with her at the end of the aisle. The way he mouthed "you are so beautiful" .The the way he pursed his lips and bowed his head like he was embarrassed to be so happy or just overwhelmed in general. It was so touching. The ceremony was nice. There wasn't anything I didn't like.
I stayed around for the kiss, too. I watched the whole procession and got choked up at all the people cheering and just wishing their love on the couple. They don't even know them, but there was so much love for them. I loved watching the people pour into the courtyard after the procession was complete. So many people and everything was so orderly. Very impressive. The kiss was less...juicy than I would have loved to see. But I was delighted to see the historic second kiss. Very sweet.
I'm American, there is no English blood flowing through my veins. I've only every been to London once, on a layover on my way to Germany. I have no personal stake in this wedding. But I'm so excited and happy to have been a witness. To again use the Churchill quote, the wedding was "bright ray of colour on the hard, grey road we have to travel". Amongst all the soul breaking news in the world: the economy, natural disasters, oil prices, civil unrest, etc it was so nice to detach for an hour. It's heart healing to see that color, frivolity, beauty, and love can still exist even when everything seems so horrible. It's hope giving to know that fairy tales can come true in this world. I may never become a princess, but maybe it's still possible to have a fairy tale happen to me. Today, though, it was enough just to watch someone else's fairy tale begin.
PS: This coffee that's reviving me now after a very early morning is delicious. Coffee, i missed you so much during Lent! Let's never part again.
April 2nd, 2011
Sorry I don't have more to say. There was a major upset at work that I'm still working through. Disgusted me enough I'm starting the job search early. Other than that I got another flat tire and I have pink eye again. Nothing new to update.
March 25th, 2011
What is the point of playing by the rules and going above and beyond if it is never rewarded and the people who brazenly ignore every rule and flaunt it are never punished?
I am so frustrated with my job right now. I'm not looking forward to finding a new job, but I am looking forward to a chance at a new start. I pray things change for the better for me/ us.
Also, i hate Kyle's stupid job and I'm sad and angry we don't get to spend the weekend together. I am so stressed and really needed this weekend to get over it. Fuck me, I guess.
March 19th, 2011
I paid off my car loan! We are now a two (fully paid for) car household with zero student loan debt. The only debt we have left is about $2500.00 in credit cards from having the fix our cars (which we now fully own) eighty bazillion times and from having to fix pink eye sixty bazillion times this winter. Next stop- home ownership! I'd like to buy a home in the next 5 years or so. In other words, except for finishing paying off the credit cards in a few months, I won't be able to brag about our debt victories for about another 60 years or so. So be it!
February 21st, 2011
This morning started with pushing Kyle's car out of the snow. He was scheduled for 6am and was supposed to call me when he got to work. He left the apartment at 5:40. Soon after he left, I started hearing sirens and freaking out. Around 6, he called me. Said he was in the parking lot. Relief flooded through me. Until he clarified that he was in the apartment parking lot. His car was suck in the snow. So, I pulled on socks, shoes, a hat, mittens, and my coat and ran out to help him. Still in my pajamas. He was quite stuck so I grabbed my broken telescoping shovel from my car. The one that doesn't telescope anymore and is actually only about 2.5 ft long. I shoveled him as much as I could and then got in front of the car to push. Shovel, push, shovel, push. I ended up having to sit in his car and try not to hyperventilate. Anyway after I caught my breath a bit we managed through my pushing and his driving back and forth bit by bit to get the car unstuck. He offered to help me dig my car out, but was already late for work so I sent him on his way.
Then I shoveled my car out. There was probably 1.5 ft of accumulated snow behind and on the sides of my car. And the plow didn't get any closer than maybe 3 ft from my car. It was a lot of digging. After getting some moved, I had to sit down again and catch my breath. My hat kept falling into my eyes so I had to discard it which meant my hair was totally free, loose, and wet. I just lifted the door to my trunk and sat down in it when I had to. I hardly even noticed the snow melting onto my pants. By the way, I wasn't wearing any underwear. Brrr. Shovel, sit, shovel, sit. I finally got the car mostly dug out. Then I got to enjoy the supreme pleasure of wiping all the snow off. Or as much as I could anyway. and then I had to scrape the ice off of the windows. Sigh. My mittens were soaking wet and covered in snow and ice so I had to discard them, too. Finally I got in the test if I could back out. I could.
I could finally go back in and get ready for work. Except, in my rush, I neglected to remember to grab my apartment keys. So I had to harass some lady digging her car out of the parking lot so I could get back in. First thing I did was strip off my clothes. Then I went to the bathroom to take a warm shower. Remember my hair was wet? Well, it twisted itself into ringlets. And then froze solid. Nice. I could only handle one glance in the mirror, it was so stupid looking. The apartment has been too hot because the furnace is broken or something so after all that I had to take a tepid shower, but it felt nice anyway. After my shower I sat down to dry off and fell asleep for 10 minutes I was so exhausted. Then I got ready and went to work. Which is a whole other story.
In summary, it was quite a day.
In other news, it looks like Kyle and I may be relocating sooner than later. I feel comfortable writing this here, it's a bit of a secret. But nobody really reads this anymore so it will remain secret still. I told my mom and she encouraged it. This broke my heart, she was supposed to tell me not to because she would miss me. But I guess not. I also kind of mentioned it to my friendboss at work because we rely on each other so much and I wanted her to have time to adjust to it and prepare. But she hardly reacted at all, too. So, it looks like nobody would miss me. Sad. It gives me kind of a preview of what it would be like if I died... We're planning on moving back to Kyle's hometown because real estate is cheaper and it's just kind of nicer than our little overpriced Milwaukee adjacent suburb that we currently live in. Anyone have any advice on relocating? Kyle thinks he can just transfer to a grocery store up there. But I would have to find a completely new job. It's kind of overwhelming to think about. Do I get the job before we move or after? When do we start looking at places? I just don't know...
February 16th, 2011
We didn't do anything. We've both been so sick for 2 weeks. Sunday night Kyle finally got the pink eye I just finished getting over so we were unable to go out to eat. I worked on Valentines day. Kyle did not because he had to call in sick for pink eye. I gave Kyle 2 cards and a box of chocolate, he gave me a card and some roses. We had to do laundry and decided that since we weren't doing anything for Valentines anyway we may as well go to the laundromat. At the laundromat, they don't care if you have pink eye. We ruined a set of sheets because there was bleach residue in the machine. We've wrecked so many things in those machines. The sheets are still usable, but have blue blotches on them now. So, were sad. So we went to Kohls to buy replacement sheets to cheer ourselves up. We ended up spending $118.00 on sheets. But, we got a set of flannel sheets and 2 sets of 400 thread counts. I think it was a pretty good investment. Then we went home and i had the very best sex of my life. So, it all evened out in the end and turned out to be a good Valentine's day.
February 7th, 2011
Our guinea pig died this weekend. It was/is very sad.
I have an eye infection.
January 31st, 2011
Sorry, been quiet lately. Bad things happening lately:
Car wouldn't start- needed new battery. Is not giving false alarms about my parking brake.\
Kyle's car needed a repair
Guinea pig is dying
Snow, lots of snow. Too much snow. Blizzard forecast for Wednesday. Being described by National Weather Service as "potentially historic"
Work is horrible. School started and we pretty much lost our part time staff coverage. One teller "semi-retired" and is down to 3 days a week. One part-timer was suspended for a week, All pressure is on me and one other teller.
I think I might have an ulcer.
I have thought, every single day for 2 weeks, that I want to die. Bad depression.
We lost our stolen internet and are now at McDonalds using theirs.
And that is why I haven't been updating. The end. I hope it gets better. I can't stand this anymore.
January 22nd, 2011
Last night I woke up after having thrown up in my mouth. I fell asleep without getting ready for bed too soon after eating a brownie. Then I accidentally fell back asleep without taking care of myself. So I woke up with acid burn in my throat and the worst taste in my mouth. This morning I was also treated to my 7th consecutive day of just-woken-up-diarrhea. What better way to start the morning, for the 7th day in a row, than with massively painful stomach cramps and 30 minutes of bathroom time followed by...massively painful stomach cramps and 30 minutes of bathroom time only 45 minutes later. It was so much fun I thought I would do it twice! 7 days in a row! That milkshake last week was a very bad decision...
January 21st, 2011
I had such a bad day. So much happened. But mostly my car won't start because of the negative temperatures. Probably. Hopefully... And I feel abandoned. Neglected. Sad. And hopeless. I don't feel like I will ever be happy again. I've felt like this for a long time. Nobody will help me and do anything about it. I don't know how to fix it myself, either.